Four years ago I started having vertigo. It was seriously bad, but I had good days here and there where I could drive and live my life. As time went on, it only got worse.

Medical Journey

I went to my doctor and he suggested a course of action.

I had my neck checked to see if any nerves were being pinched. All was well. Not the problem.

I went to the balance center and went through a series of tests.

My balance was tested, but it either was or wasn’t. No apparent reason.

Then my ears were tested. My eardrums were bombarded with warm water. I caused so much vertigo I thought I would fall off the table and throw up. It turned out that there was permanent damage to my left eardrum. This caused my world to permanently tilt about 16 degrees to the right. It was not the cause of my vertigo, but it didn’t help. My brain would compensate. It did however cause me to list.

I then went to a neurologist. I was told that it was possibly a migraine, but to wait it out and see if it got better. It didn’t.

Walking On a Moving Roller Coaster

Life just got more interesting from there. The vertigo went from sporadic to constant.

Walking became more and more difficult. Driving became impossible. I went from a cane to a walker. Then I started tipping my walker. I was not only housebound, but chair bound. Just getting to the bathroom was a challenge.

I became very good at architectural checks. I tested the stability of the walls, doors, door frames, and furniture by falling against them as I tried to get from one place to the next. I tested the solidity of the floor, but only a few times because my children told me I was not allowed to fall.

I could sit in my recliner, put my hands in the air, and enjoy the feel of riding my own personal roller coaster.

Sometimes, I threw up.

Gravitational Challenges

Have you ever wondered what it would be like if you could feel the world spin? It is seriously unpleasant.

Anything more than an arms length from my face moved. I couldn’t watch television. Even movies on my computer made me sick. I was left with few options.

I could still sew as long as the table was willing to stand still. It didn’t always.

Crocheting, reading, listening to books and music were all I could do. Since I was bound to my chair I did a lot of those. In three years I read or listened to over a thousand books and crocheted three twin size afghans, several stuffed animals, scarves, mittens, and hats.

I chafed at my limited activities. I got grumpy. I got whiny. You know it is bad when your 16 year old daughter puts her hands on her hips, gives you an very annoyed look, and says, “Mom! Quit whining and deal with it!”

Dark Days

Depression was a serious problem. The things I enjoyed slowly disappeared one after another.

Since I could not get out of the house to attend social functions. I was slowly distanced from society. My friends are busy and have children in school and activities. They came to visit when they could. I got out when I could.

I could no longer make cookies or do holiday baking. Even a simple dinner became impossible. Sharp knives and hot stoves are dangerous if you lose your balance.

On a good day, I could make me a sandwich or microwave some soup.

I couldn’t get outside to go for a walk or sit in the sun. I put my recliner near the window that got the most direct sun light. It helped. Sort of. Sometimes.

My humor became a little skewed, but it made people smile. It was the only way I could get through it. I’d rather laugh than cry.

My Daughters Are the Best

Youngest was only 15 when the vertigo started. She was the snitch when I misbehaved. It happened a lot because I don’t behave well.

She had just gotten her driver’s permit. She had to learn to drive so that she could get places with me along for the ride. She learned to drive some difficult roads just so she could continue her harp lessons.

This paid off when Youngest got her license. She had the car all to herself her senior year of high school. She became the cool kid with the car. She drove and her friends paid her way. It was good to see her spread her wings and get out of the house.

Oldest was the back up. When I got into trouble (medically, physically or emotionally) Youngest would call her and Oldest would intervene. Sometimes she threatened to call my mother.

She was also mediator during Covid. It was only Youngest and I at home. We got on each other’s nerves. During a disagreement about chores that needed to be done that I could not do, Oldest put her foot down. Hard. She told Youngest and I that if she had to come mediate again she would strangle us. Then she would lay us on the floor with our hands around each other’s throat and call the police. She would then proceed to tell them that Youngest and I had been having difficulties with the quarantine and she found us this way when she came to check on us.

We behaved. Oldest can be scary at times.

Finally! The Ride Ends

After three very long years, my oldest daughter made me go to the neurologist again. We found a different one. She was wonderful. She talked about the difference between regular migraines (lots of pain, light and sound sensitivity) and vestibular migraines (no pain, just miscellaneous physical symptoms).

Since I was not having any pain, we decided to try the treatment for the vestibular migraines. I was prescribed a new medication called Ajovy. It worked! The vertigo stopped within about four days.

There was a problem though. My world had been moving for so long that my brain kept trying to stop something that wasn’t moving. The world would jerk to the right and then recenter itself. It took about two weeks for my brain to readjust to an unmoving world. It was an interesting experience to be sure.

I’m starting to get my life back, but it will take a while.