Over the last seven months I have gone through the same Post Traumatic Stress therapy that they put our soldiers through. It is called Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) and it is very intense.
I Don’t Wanna!
It was bad enough to live through the abuse in the first place, I didn’t want to relive it. Each session left me emotional wrung out, physically exhausted and mentally drained. It was difficult to function after each session. The nightmares and flash-backs were sometimes more vivid and intense. The anxiety was almost constant.
I did not want to do this, but I didn’t really have an option. I was in a safe and quiet place in my life (finally!) and my mind started defragging on its own. I figured it was better to get help than to try to do it on my own. I’m glad I had the support of my family.
I’m Glad I Did
While it was painful and difficult, I’m glad I went through this therapeutic process. I’m in a much better place emotionally and free to move forward with my life. There is, of course, a huge hole where all that anger, frustration and heart ache was stored. It is a space that I am now free to fill it with laughter, good memories and joy.
I could not have done this without the help and support of my family. Especially my parents who were there every step of the way. I also want to thank you for your words of encouragement and support. Now, pass out the chocolate!