Dimension of Major Vexation

We have all been the DMV (Department of Motor Vehicles).  The long lines, lost time, confusion and dread has become legendary.  Many of us remember the great rejoicing across the nation when it became possible to renew your driver’s license through the mail.  Then, of course, came the renewal of your car registration over the internet.  I know many people who almost fainted with rapture at the very thought.

Why am I talking about the DMV today?  Well, I will tell you.  I discovered yesterday that my driver’s license expires tomorrow.  Currently, in Utah, you cannot renew your driver’s license by mail.  You must present, in person, at least three valid forms of identification and citizenship.  They are:

  • A certified birth certificate or valid passport
  • Your social security number
  • Your unexpired driver’s license

This morning I got up and lazed around all morning putting off my trip to the DMV.  I finally decided I should get moving so I got in the shower and got dressed.  I then went to retrieve my birth certificate and social security card.

Birth Certificate

I was not born in Utah but in Poughkeepsie, New York.  I knew I had my birth certificate because I had spent $70 getting it not too long ago.  This morning however it seems to have turned into a snake.  I looked in the papers where I kept it and it wasn’t there.  I began frantically searching through my filing cabinet and drawers.  After serious searching (and not finding it) I went back to the original location to have another look.  There it was right on top.

Social Security Card

I then went to get my Social Security card out of its place of residence and it was not there.  I knew it wasn’t anywhere else because I had already thoroughly searched through my papers looking for my birth certificate.  Then I remembered (somewhat vaguely) that I had needed to take it somewhere with me so I looked in my wallet.  My wallet is a world until itself.  It has at least 30 pockets and compartments of all sizes.  I was starting to get a little worried as I went through pocket after compartment without seeing hide nor hair of the card.  Finally I came to the smallest most difficult pocket and found it.

The Drive

Normally I would just drive over to the DMV, but today was different.  It has been at least five years since I’ve been to the DMV and it was no longer at the location I remember.  I did find it, but it was on the other side of the freeway and there was some serious construction and a road closure between it and me.  Since I had not been to the new location I didn’t know the back roads to the DMV.  I followed the detour signs.  I was sent four blocks north, four blocks west, four blocks south and 3.5 blocks east to get there.

I didn’t help that my brain kept wandering off and taking the car with it.  I ended up several places before forcing my brain to focus on getting to the right place.  After several tries I finally reached my destination.

Oh!  My!  Heck!

After spending 45 minutes just trying to get to the DMV (a destination only about 15 minutes from my home) I am not in any way, shape or form feeling like dealing with anyone at the DMV.  When I went inside I about dropped dead from the shock.

The building is quiet, cool, well-organized and the line is almost nonexistent during the lunch hour.  I began the process.  The required paperwork was easily accessible on a long counter running parallel to the line with lots of space and plenty of working pens.  Posted around the wall of the table are signs listing the required documentation as well as pamphlets explaining why they are needed.  The paperwork was easy to read and quick to fill out.  The people were kind, polite and attentive to their work.  Here is how my visit went:

  • Fill out application     –  3 minutes
  • Waiting in line            –  2 minutes
  • State reason for visit
  • documents reviewed – 3 minutes
  • Have picture taken    – 1 minute
  • Waiting in line           –  5 minutes
  • complete paperwork
  • Pay license fees        – 5 minute

Total time spent in the DMV was less than 20 minutes.  Yippee!

Have a great day!  I know I’m taking the rest of the time I planned on spending at the DMV and having a nap.

P.S.  I fell asleep before I posted this.  Silly me.

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